Daily Toreador

Texas Tech Opinions Column Nov. 14, 2013

Let’s talk about dating. I’ll be honest with you; I’ve been married for three years, and have been with my husband since I was a teenager, three years before he even popped the question. So while, I don’t have the most experience in the matter, I have great knowledge regarding the methods of dating, and as they say “those who can’t, teach.”

I often listen to my friends the morning after they’ve been on a date. With my coffee in hand and knowing I’m free from the anxiety and worry of dating, I find their conversation almost enjoyable, like a personal soap opera of the lonely hearted. It sounds harsh, perhaps it is, but I’m curious and daunted by the very idea of dating.

Who asks whom out? Does he pay? Does modern day feminism mean it’s insulting for him to pay? What if he takes you to Joyland? The horror!

I’m intrigued by how young women act on a date and how they interpret a date once it’s over.

How does one act on a date? Should a lady act awkward and shy, order a salad and leave half of it on her plate by the end of the meal or does she order the 12 oz rib eye, loaded baked potato and then proceed to ask her date if she has something in her teeth?  There is indeed a happy medium. Just act like yourself, right? Well if your natural self is vulgar and frankly a little distasteful, you may want to work on that on your own time. Simply act like a young lady, which you are, somewhere deep down.

Do you remember those rules your mother and Emily Post drove into you until thought your brain would explode? Now is the time to put those rules into action.

Emily Post, the expert in manners and etiquette, was once quoted saying, “Nothing is less important than which fork you use. Etiquette is the science of living. It embraces everything. It is ethics. It is honor." You should always expect a gentleman to open your door, offer to pay for your meal and treat you with honor and decency, but if he does not: 1. He is not a true gentleman 2. He is not worth your time and 3. You should simply leave the date calmly, respectfully and without a single vulgar word to say.

I know it sounds like a lot more fun to bash him on Facebook and warn all your friends against he jerk who wanted to go Dutch, but it shows a lot more courage and maturity if you don’t. Remember you have your honor and self-respect to uphold.

And then there’s the whole act of getting dressed for a date. Modesty isn’t something our generation is known for; we’ve come a long way from the times of scandalous bare ankles. It’s more common to see a young “lady” roll their skirt up a few times than to see her button that extra button up top. How does she approach getting ready for a new date? Does she leave something to the imagination? Edith Head once said, “A dress should be tight enough to show you’re a woman but loose enough to show you’re a lady.” However, she also said, “You can have anything you want in life if you dress for it.” What are you dressing for when you’re preparing for the first date?

Edith Head was an awarded costume designer of the 1950’s when sex appeal was still considered quite scandalous, the birth control pill was yet to be discovered and women, more often than not, stayed at home tending to their children while their husband went to work. It seems Edith was ahead of her times. She was the mind behind the impeccably dressed Sophia Loren in “That Kind of Woman.” Sophia Loren was the epitome of sex appeal back in the 50’s and 60’s. However is there is a big difference between vintage sex appeal and generation Y sex appeal.

It’s okay to show a little leg, eat a little too much, and to use your salad fork for your entre, but it’s certainly not okay to show everything you’ve got, ask him to check your teeth, or to allow him to make rude propositions to you. Simply remember that before he rings your doorbell, you only have your honor and self-respect regardless of how you dress or even act, and do you really want him to take those away from you or assume you don’t have any at all?  

Texas Tech Opinions Column Nov. 7, 2013

We currently live in a time of great anticipation. As generation y, we are always on the verge of an anxiety attack while waiting for our hilarious Facebook status to be “liked” thirty-six seconds after posting it. Our constant attachments to our phones and detachment to the world around us is what we, as a generation will be remembered for. The etiquette and manners of time past has eluded us. Our radios are programmed to stations that glorify hate and violence, and even more appalling, the run around of women. What is there to be proud of when Sinatra has been replaced by Kanye and Snooki is the new June Cleaver?

Do we have standards? Are they high standards? What ever happened to having manners and abiding by the laws of etiquette Emily Post wrote down clear as day?

College is supposed to be the best time of our lives. So why not go out and get a little crazy, have a good time, and show up to class the next morning with X’s on our hands smelling like smoke? Some would say that it’s a miracle that they made it to class, and their professor should just be glad he/she showed up, regardless of how they look. I could not disagree more.

Our college professors are the exact people we, as a class, should be trying to impress and show respect to at all times.  When you’re a month out from graduating and have no job prospects, whom are you going to run to for a letter of recommendation? Your very future could ride on our how your teachers remember you as a student and see you as a future professional.

What does this have to do with having high standards? Everything. Having respect for your teachers, your peers, and yourself is the first step to proper etiquette and manners.

Like I mentioned before, showing up to class looking and smelling like your rolled out of bed is not flattering. Sorority girl chic may be all the rage, but it’s not getting you ahead in life. Student’s inability to get dressed and make it to class on time in the morning baffles me. Blair Waldorf said it herself, “tights are not pants!” Though she’s a fictional character, she had a point. Don’t get me wrong, comfort should be a priority when getting dressed, but so should looking put together.

In a class of hundreds, do teachers really notice if you roll in dressed in your tights and oversized shirt? Probably not, but you can bet your Ugg boots they notice when you walk in with your head held high, your hands missing the telltale X, and looking like you didn’t skimp on your morning coffee.

This doesn’t just increase your chances of impressing your teachers, it increase your chances, dramatically, of improving your future.

It’s a habit you really should try to break now. Why spend $90 on the ever-popular LuLu Lemon workout tights you won’t work out in? Instead invest in pieces that you will be able transfer to your future work attire.  Isn’t that what college is about, to prepare you for your future?

Consider if your teachers were your boss or mentor in the work environment, would they be impressed by your current choice of attire? As you will, one day need to get up, get dressed, and head into work bright eyed and bushy tailed, shouldn’t you start preparing for that transition now?

We all hate 8am classes and most us are guilty of skipping on occasion in order to get that extra hour of sleep, however, there will be no skipping the 8am clock in time of your job, just because you’re a little sleepy. The dropping of a letter grade will seem feeble compared to the repercussions of a lost job, all because you couldn’t get out of bed and make yourself presentable on time.

So here’s my closing advise for you: get up, dress up, and keep your head up; no one ever regretted getting dressed in the morning or trying to impress their teachers, but someone somewhere is regretting their college choices everyday when they look in the mirror and see themselves in a vastly different position they had imagined themselves to be in. So stay classy, Texas Tech, and remember: Tights are not pants.